Hooters: tmi

So at least once a month the crew tries to get together and have a meal together.  Be it breakfast, lunch or dinner.  This time it was time to go to Hooters.  Now mind you I would never think I would ever set my feet inside this place full of boobs.  However this is my 3rd trip and they do have some of the best boneless wings.  Even better than Buffalo wild wings.  Though I still love buffalo wild wings fried pickles better.  So we went out and had a blast.  Last time I wanted to ask the waitress if we could have a different waitress since she was boobless.  Yea yea I know that’s mean.  But hey it’s hooters.  Not look like an 8yr old boy place.  This go round we had our ER tech with us.  This is a guy that wants to share WAY to much information when he has had a few to many.  Or any at all…  He asked questions like where was the wildest place you had sex, have you had a 3some and other blah blah stuff.  Who the hell really needs to hear this trash.  Especially since you have to work with these people.  Do you really think I am going to air out my dirty laundry so my coworker will know all.  I think not.  I also wonder if he is just feeling out to see who the work ho is so he can make his move.  BLARG.  No thanks I don’t want to play this game…TAXI

Being a Nurse always means TMI

Being a nurse you are told things and shown things that you wish you could pluck your eye balls out or shove sharp instruments in your ears.  So if your squeamish don’t read any further.

First there was this family came in and the 63yr old male was here for swollen scrotum.  Pretty swollen and apparently been oozing.  Since I was in triage I place him in a young new nurse’s room.  Not on purpose mind you but let just say she had never saw anything like that I was pretty shocked.  But not as shocked as the Hospitalist that went in to talk with the family because the patient was going to be admitted.  She walked in and was getting some history when the daughter 31 yrs old drew back the sheet and exposed her dad’s junk.  Which was weird anyway but was made worse when the daughter lifted up her dads nuts and said see most of the swelling and chaffing is here.  I have been rubbing Vaseline on his scrotum to help with the pain.  Mind you the 63 yr olds girlfriend was also in the room AWKWARD!
How about the 18 yr old with Herpes that made her boyfriend leave the room because she didn’t want him to know that she had herpes.  Lovely.  Hope he was using a condom.Which also reminds me of the guy with Herpes so bad it went all the way to his butthole.  Which was really hard to see.
The women who come in all the time for vaginal pain.  I really think they love the doctors looking at their privates time and time again.  Nothing starts my day off than watching one of the doctors cram their arm up a big girl’s hooha.. sheeh.
Believe me I have seen too many woman’s crotches to count. See I have this thing right here as she spreads her legs…. Not to mention peckers..dear lord I have seen more of them than a street hooker.
Then of course you always  have the rambling patient that can never get to WHY ARE YOU HERE.  Well I have this cough and this hang nail on my toe. Also about 2 years ago I had left knee surgery. But now my right knee hurts…AHHHHHH