What do we do now??

Yea I have to join the band wagon since it’s everywhere.  This year will be know as the year the Twinkie died.  Don’t get me wrong I love the Twinkie.  I can’t eat it now that I have dieting but it’s part of my childhood.  I remember eating them afterschool and in my school lunch.  The best way to eat them?  Frozen.  Freaking awesome!
The sad part is I never knew these things had the shelf life of forever.  So apparently people are buying these golden cakes up.  To store for later?  To share with grandchildren in years to come?  To enjoy slowly till you run out?  I think not to sell on EBAY duh.  These suckers are going for as much as 60 bucks a box.  Imagine what they will be when they get more scarce?      Who needs stock when you have boxes of Twinkies to sell?
What a sad world we live in.

I was a Zombie

So I was suppose to post every day but I turned into a walking Zombie.  After only getting 3 hours of sleep after waking up from working the night before I had many things to do.  I took my kids to their first pep band for middle school.  They helped the high school band at the local homecoming football game.  I finally got home around 11.  Unfortunately the lack of sleep brought on one of those sleep deprived migraines from hell.  You know the ones where you walk around with your eyes have closed, holding your head, moaning and bumping into things.  This type of “zombie” does moan brains but shut up everyone my head hurts.”  This zombie also can revert back into human once they have eaten, slept and medicated.  Unfortunately I skipped 2 of those and woke up at 530 am with a pounding in my head.  I had to eat and take meds and go back to bed.  So I am back posting this for my disappearance…lol  I know it’s cheating…wait this is my blog and do whatever I want…muahaha

Strange things

Yes I though I loved zombies but apparently there are bigger zombie fans out there.  What I have learned playing on the internet
~The official Ribbon for the dead:  a grey one and the official awareness month May. Want to know more? Grey Ribbon
~ Like to run In 5 K races?  How about one where zombie’s chase you.  You got a 5K race with obstacles in which you have to outrun zombies. It's designed a bit like flag football, you're given a belt with flags to serve as your health bar.  You make stops to pick up more health. From what I have seen on video…the zombies can actually run..that would freak me out.  Want to know more? Zombie run
~There is a Zombie food pyramid.  Really?  I wonder if I follow it will I lose weight.  Want to see it? Zombie food pyramid
~Zombie have moved up in the world.  They have their own fb now.  Friend them if you dare…or at least like the page. Add zombie friend
~People will actually click that last thing…and add zombie
~ Zombies have their own alcholic drink.  Here’s the reciepe:

1/2 oz Bacardi® 151 rum
1 oz pineapple juice
1 oz orange juice
1/2 oz apricot brandy
1 tsp sugar
2 oz light rum
1 oz dark rum
1 oz lime juice

~ There are Zombie socks..which I want btw:
~ Hello I even found awesome garden Zombie.  I want this also   I how ever DO NOT want this…gnomes are creepy all by themselves.
 
Okay so there is some strange things on Zombies

How to tell if you’re a Zombie

Top Ten Symptoms of Necroambulation..
I like posting this every Halloween in hopes I have educated someone new.  If you have read this you may just skip it or enjoy it all over again.

10. Every Time You Speak it Comes Out as a Moan – One of the classic symptoms of zombification is the loss of coherent speech. Go all the way back to Frankenstein's Monster. The vocal chords are delicate and can be among the first things to go. Try saying this phrase: The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain. Everything come out okay? Good. If not, you are either a zombie or Eliza Doolittle.
Other Possible Explanation: You are currently engaged in sexual intercourse.
9. People Remark that You Smell Like Roadkill- First of all, if anyone has ever said this within earshot of you...damn. Secondly, I hate to tell you that this is another symptom. You see, dead things smell bad. That's just the way it is. Autolysis and putrefaction lead to the release of gases which are the main cause of that sickly sweet odor of death. Chances are good that you are in fact a reanimated corpse.
Other Possible Explanation: You have poor hygiene. Treatment: Bathe.
8. Passersby Complement You on Your Sexy Shamble- It is a well-known fact (at least to Romero fans) that zombies have limited mobility. There is no blood flow to the muscles, what would you expect? Not to mention the fact that tendons and other soft tissues will be rotting away. Running zombies may be scarier to some but come on, does it really make sense? Let's be rational here. Hehe. If your walk can be categorized as a lurch or a stumble you could be in real trouble.
Other Possible Explanation: You are drunk.
7. You Have an Uncontrollable Urge to Go to the Mall- I don't know what it is about the mall, but it happens all the time. Is our need for consumerism so prevalent that it reaches beyond the limitations of death? Look at Dawn of the Dead (both versions) and even the video game Dead Rising. Apparently it is just an inevitability. Do you often feel yourself being pulled by the sway of Macy's or Hot Topic? Sounds like zombie time to me.
Other Possible Explanation: You are a teenager or just have nothing better to do.
6. Hunger is Your Only Motivation- Sure we all have the drive to eat in order to sustain our own lives. But if your hunger is all-consuming, if it just won't go away no matter what you eat, if you find yourself walking miles to track down something that smells yummy...you may be a goner. Once you have been infected, nothing else will matter. Your need to feed will prey on your mind like you will prey on your neighbors and you will never be sated.
Other Possible Explanation: You are stoned. (Note: This could also be the underlying cause for many of the signs. Do you also have the urge to watch cartoons and laugh at nothing? If so, you are fine)
5. Your Friends Keep Trying to Bean You on the Head- We all know the most effective way to dispatch the living dead is to kill the brain. A gunshot to the head, a bat to the noggin, a tire iron to the skull...these are all good. And your friends all know this too. If you find yourself having to constantly shield your grey matter from the onslaught of weapons, you may be a zombie.
Other Possible Explanation: You have lousy friends.
4. Your Rate of Decomposition Has Severely Increased- We know that the body begins its slow decline as soon as we are born. The flesh is only designed to sustain life for so long. This is why we age and why we begin to fall apart (metaphorically) as we grow older. But if you are literally falling apart, this could be cause for concern. In the case of reanimation, there should also be the characteristic smell we discussed earlier. If you present with both of these symptoms, you are probably among the population of the undead.
Other Possible Explanation: You have leprosy which is generally characterized by skin lesions. Leprosy will not cause your limbs to fall off so if you start dropping body parts on the carpet, you should seek the attention of your local mortician.
3. You Were Pronounced Dead and People Ran Screaming When You Got Up- It is not uncommon, even in today's advanced society, for people to occasionally lose signs of life. Chances are good you could be revived by a team of medical experts or someone on hand to administer the likes of CPR. The usual response is gleeful gratitude expressed by those around you. But if you die and your awakening prompts a negative response, mainly one of fear or repulsion, then you have likely been zombified. If this is the case, I would be on the lookout for number 5 above. That is often the next logical reaction.
Other Possible Explanations: You are rich and your family was waiting for you to kick the bucket or you just aren't very well liked.
2. You Crave Human Flesh- Probably the number one symptom of zombiehood is the need to feed on the flesh of the living. There are various explanations of this phenomena depending upon which canon you follow. Some believe it lessens the pain of being dead. But no matter what you believe, you cannot deny that if this urge suddenly forms, the odds of you being a revenant are highly likely. I recommend you distance yourself from the public as quickly as possible. Most people are not fond of being gnawed on at random.
Other Possible Explanation: You are simply a cannibal. In either case, keep away from me.
1. You Have Been Bitten by a Zombie- This one is undeniable and there is little recourse unless you happen to boast a natural immunity but I wouldn't count on this being the case. If you have in fact been chewed by a member of the living dead, you can go ahead and plan your cremation. The typical funeral will only prolong the effects and cause you discomfort as you attempt to climb out of your grave. You will also probably attack those you love and that is not a pleasant thought for anyone.
Other Possible Explanation: I got nothing. You are screwed, my friend

Best Zombie Flicks

I love George A. Romero’s Zombie flicks.  So for halloween if your looking for great Zombie flicks check these out…
Scary and Gruesome

1. I like this version over the older one
2. Black and white please!
3. yes I know this is a tv show but it rocks!
5. The second one is much better than the first. Because the first one he spent the first hour yelling HELLO?? ugh
6. Best comical zombie movie hands down.
7. This one is the best. The second one isn’t bad but as they go on…they are less zombie and more action.
8. Another original favorite
9. The original is the best but the new one isn’t bad
10. When u need a new zombie movie after you seen the rest.

This week is Zombie week

So this week is dedicated to Zombie.  If by the way you are weak in the stomach then you best not read this post.  I had a patient come in a few weeks back.  He walks in to my triage.  The computer tells me his chief complaint is an abscess.  Non medical folks: An abscess is a collection of pus in any part of the body that, in most cases, causes swelling and inflammation around it.  He has it covered with a bandage so I can not see it.  But this guy isn’t acting right.  He barely answers my questions and seriously is out of it.  His girlfriend seems to want to tell me what is going on but can’t.  I had to pull his teeth just to get him to talk to me.  I told him that I don’t know how to help him if he doesn’t answer my questions.  He mumble to most of my questions.  I take him back and he gets up from the wheel chair and about tumbles into the floor. By the way he was here for an arm abscess.  He said he could get up with no problem.  At this point I am hollering for our male nurse to help.  He gets him into the bed. We get him connected to the monitor and all.  I tell the doctor something is up with this guy.  Either the infection is so bad he is weak or he is truly on something.  While the doctor talks to the patient the girlfriend leaves and pulls me aside.  He apparently shoots up with Morphine.  He has been squeezing at this place on his forearm for awhile.  Most likely where he shoots up.  It look like something out of a zombie flick.  The skin was literally rotting off this dude’s arm.  Most people come into the ER with an abscess the size of a quarter.  The doctor makes and incision and removes the pus by squeezing.  Like a giant zit.  So if you’re a zit popper this would be a dream to you.  Here's is a mild picture of an abscess.
His was 4 times this size and the skin had forced itself open.  When the doctor squeezed this thing it look liked chunks of his arm fell out.  IT WAS AWESOME!!  I know I am gross.  But that’s one of the reasons I became a nurse.

Best Zombie Books

5 top zombie books

1. a zombie series where everyone above the age of 16 dies leaving the children to fend for themselves against the zombies.  Followed by  the next book the dead and then the fear.  Great series.
2. excerpt from Goodreads “The cell phone users in Stephen King's tale of horror are plagued by problems much bigger than poor reception, costly roaming charges, or dropped calls: Some unspeakably malevolent force has turned them into raging, bloodthirsty zombies!”I guarantee you won’t look at your cell phone the same way again
3.   followed by the next book Death and Decay. Goodreads Except “In the zombie-infested, post-apocalyptic America where Benny Imura lives, every teenager must find a job by the time they turn fifteen or get their rations cut in half. Benny doesn't want to apprentice as a zombie hunter with his boring older brother Tom, but he has no choice. He expects a tedious job whacking zoms for cash, but what he gets is a vocation that will teach him what it means to be human.”
4.   okay so sue me it’s a comic book.  But this is absolutely the best zombie collection.  If you are a true Zombie fan you must have this.
5. okay so I haven’t technically read this one just yet.  It comes out this month.  But it’s a novel based on my favorite comics. So how can it go wrong right?  Well I will let you know just as soon as I read it.

Prepare for the Rapture: you might be dead

10. Every Time You Speak it Comes Out as a Moan – One of the classic symptoms of zombification is the loss of coherent speech. Go all the way back to Frankenstein's Monster. The vocal chords are delicate and can be among the first things to go. Try saying this phrase: The rain in Spain stays mainly on the plain. Everything come out okay? Good. If not, you are either a zombie or Eliza Doolittle.

Other Possible Explanation: You are currently engaged in sexual intercourse.

9. People Remark that You Smell Like Roadkill- First of all, if anyone has ever said this within earshot of you...damn. Secondly, I hate to tell you that this is another symptom. You see, dead things smell bad. That's just the way it is. Autolysis and putrefaction lead to the release of gases which are the main cause of that sickly sweet odor of death. Chances are good that you are in fact a reanimated corpse.

Other Possible Explanation: You have poor hygiene. Treatment: Bathe.

8. Passersby Complement You on Your Sexy Shamble- It is a well-known fact (at least to Romero fans) that zombies have limited mobility. There is no blood flow to the muscles, what would you expect? Not to mention the fact that tendons and other soft tissues will be rotting away. Running zombies may be scarier to some but come on, does it really make sense? Let's be rational here. Hehe. If your walk can be categorized as a lurch or a stumble you could be in real trouble.

Other Possible Explanation: You are drunk.

7. You Have an Uncontrollable Urge to Go to the Mall- I don't know what it is about the mall, but it happens all the time. Is our need for consumerism so prevalent that it reaches beyond the limitations of death? Look at Dawn of the Dead (both versions) and even the video game Dead Rising. Apparently it is just an inevitability. Do you often feel yourself being pulled by the sway of Macy's or Hot Topic? Sounds like zombie time to me.

Other Possible Explanation: You are a teenager or just have nothing better to do.

6. Hunger is Your Only Motivation- Sure we all have the drive to eat in order to sustain our own lives. But if your hunger is all-consuming, if it just won't go away no matter what you eat, if you find yourself walking miles to track down something that smells yummy...you may be a goner. Once you have been infected, nothing else will matter. Your need to feed will prey on your mind like you will prey on your neighbors and you will never be sated.

Other Possible Explanation: You are stoned. (Note: This could also be the underlying cause for many of the signs. Do you also have the urge to watch cartoons and laugh at nothing? If so, you are fine)

5. Your Friends Keep Trying to Bean You on the Head- We all know the most effective way to dispatch the living dead is to kill the brain. A gunshot to the head, a bat to the noggin, a tire iron to the skull...these are all good. And your friends all know this too. If you find yourself having to constantly shield your grey matter from the onslaught of weapons, you may be a zombie.

Other Possible Explanation: You have lousy friends.

4. Your Rate of Decomposition Has Severely Increased- We know that the body begins its slow decline as soon as we are born. The flesh is only designed to sustain life for so long. This is why we age and why we begin to fall apart (metaphorically) as we grow older. But if you are literally falling apart, this could be cause for concern. In the case of reanimation, there should also be the characteristic smell we discussed earlier. If you present with both of these symptoms, you are probably among the population of the undead.

Other Possible Explanation: You have leprosy which is generally characterized by skin lesions. Leprosy will not cause your limbs to fall off so if you start dropping body parts on the carpet, you should seek the attention of your local mortician.

3. You Were Pronounced Dead and People Ran Screaming When You Got Up- It is not uncommon, even in today's advanced society, for people to occasionally lose signs of life. Chances are good you could be revived by a team of medical experts or someone on hand to administer the likes of CPR. The usual response is gleeful gratitude expressed by those around you. But if you die and your awakening prompts a negative response, mainly one of fear or repulsion, then you have likely been zombified. If this is the case, I would be on the lookout for number 5 above. That is often the next logical reaction.

Other Possible Explanations: You are rich and your family was waiting for you to kick the bucket or you just aren't very well liked.

2. You Crave Human Flesh- Probably the number one symptom of zombiehood is the need to feed on the flesh of the living. There are various explanations of this phenomena depending upon which canon you follow. Some believe it lessens the pain of being dead. But no matter what you believe, you cannot deny that if this urge suddenly forms, the odds of you being a revenant are highly likely. I recommend you distance yourself from the public as quickly as possible. Most people are not fond of being gnawed on at random.

Other Possible Explanation: You are simply a cannibal. In either case, keep away from me.

1. You Have Been Bitten by a Zombie- This one is undeniable and there is little recourse unless you happen to boast a natural immunity but I wouldn't count on this being the case. If you have in fact been chewed by a member of the living dead, you can go ahead and plan your cremation. The typical funeral will only prolong the effects and cause you discomfort as you attempt to climb out of your grave. You will also probably attack those you love and that is not a pleasant thought for anyone.

Other Possible Explanation: I got nothing. You are screwed, my friend