I PAD, Kindle Fire, Nook Tablet or Android Tablet?

So fellow bloggers.  I want a tablet.  What do I need?  What do you have and why do you like it?  I have tried to research it but my brain hurts now. Most seem if you like apple then get IPAD vs the get android only people.  Help!!

What I am looking for?
Typing up blogs when the ideas come to me
Checking emails
Apps love the games
Facebook and can you play their games?
Watching online movies from Hulu, Dish network or HBO to go.
Battery life is a plus.  The only thing bad about watching on my phone or IPOD is it dies to early
Great processor

What I don't care about
music- I have an IPOD for that
Video chatting- I have my Droid razor phone I need to be heard not seen
Ereader- I have a nook already and I prefer the e-ink format for less strain on the eyes.

Learning how to dress yourself part 2

As mentioned before in many of my watching people posts the pj people annoy the crap out of me.  Yet they are not the only fashion freaks out there.  I was out to eat with the youngest when a girl came in with a tee shirt, yoga pants and pink fuzzy slippers.  In the same place there was a lady with black leggings and cheetah print slippers with fuzzy balls on them.  Can we not afford shoes anymore?  You know as well as I do that they are not water proof.  Yet this people were out in the rain in these shoes.  I have slippers and even though they maybe comfortable indoors they are not equipped to be worn outdoors.  For many reasons!  Besides the weather wear they are not supportive of your feet.  That is one of the reasons I would love to tell my patients who sprain or break their leg because they tripped in their own shoes.
One of the other group of people who should be arrested by the fashion police is allowing your kids to dress themselves.  I mean if they are 2-3 by all means avoid that temper tantrum.  Mine left the house in a princess outfit.  But to allow your 8 year old to dress like a hoochie is down right embarrassing.  They should not be wearing animal print leggings with a black skirt and “Pretty Woman” hooker boots. People wonder why their kids get abducted.
How about the fact it’s 40 degrees and they bring their boy and  is wearing shorts.  Really?  Or the poor baby Dressed in a onesie with a blanket.  GRR. 
Not saying that I am dressed to the T ever time I go out.  I don’t care if you go out in your sweatpants.  Just leave the house outfits at home.  Learn to dress your kids too.  If you are wearing sweatshirt and a winter coat they should not be wearing summer outfits.  Just saying..

Happy Gobble Gobble day.

So I thought I would wish my readers a wonderful thanksgiving.  Please pray for me as I embark on my annual in law get together.  Last year I lucked out and had to work.  Though I heard it was drama free.  Never fails the ex sister in law send her current husband’s kid to our family get together.  Who the heck sends their step kids to their ex’s house?  Messed up ones.  But any way.  I wanted to share some funny pics I found relating to Thanksgiving and the dreaded black Friday.  Are any of you trekking out to the stores on this crazy shopping day?  I did one year.  Words of advice don’t wear a coat no matter how cold it’s outside.  Because it 100 degrees in the store and of course you can’t have a buggy because that will just slow you down.  So hauling everything in your arms with a thick hot winter coat and starving half to death will just guarantee that you will pass out.  Not a good thing since you may get trampled and picked over by the vultures that are hoping you might drop that last pair of hot pink fuzzy pj pants that you got for your niece.  You know they want to wear that next year to Wal-Mart.  I will be sleeping as everyone else runs around trying to get that last lala loopsy crazy hair doll.   I will be working that night in the ER.  I can help stitch and supple crutches to the winner of the next new toy.So hope everyone has a drama free thanksgiving.

Shot of Reality: Really you are wearing that?

Dear PJ People,
I really don’t want to see what pajamas you wear at home.  Walking into the stores still dressed like you rolled of bed is just pure laziness.  I really have to contain myself from asking are you just that sorry?  Fuzzy pant pj’s belong at home not tucked into your winter boots or flips flops.  And really?  You wore your slippers too?  WTF
Sincerely, I learn to dress myself when I was a toddler
PS if you are too lazy to get dress for the day do us a favor be to lazy to leave the house.

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Dear Cell Phone Users,
There is a time and a place for cell phones.  There should be a law if you get caught using them in the wrong place we have the right to shove them where they don’t belong.  Like your butt!  Theaters are one place, standing in line at McDonalds and for those that can’t multitask the car might be another.  But the one that takes the cake for me.  Get the F*uck off the phone while I am triaging you.  Nothing proves your not a 10 on the scale when you texting and talking to me. 
Sincerely want to see if you can butt dial?
PS family who decides to come in with patient.  I don’t want to hear you dumb ass ring tones while trying to get a history from you loved one who is sick.  Take it outside asshole.

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Dear Er patients
The emergency room is not the place to have family get together.  Now if they are dying I am not talking about you.  This is for the “toothache patients” the “hemorrhoid patient” and the “broken” anything patients.  Do you have any idea just how sick people are while they are here?  If you visit healthy there is a good chance we may see you 3 days later with the stomach flu.  DUH.  Why anyone wants to bring their 3 month old to the ER while visiting a friend is beyond me.  Or how about the 8 family members that show up for the hemorrhoid patient.  Really you want the whole family there while we check out your ass?  I wish this ER would stick to the 2 family members per patient.  This might help keep my hallways clear of nosey family members
Sincerely working in an EMERGENCY ROOM not the Holiday Inn or Chucky Cheese.

Filet-o-nuts

So I have seen some gross and wild things from being a nurse.  Weirder ones now that I am an ER nurse but this next patient tops them all.  I had a patient that came in with testicular pain.  Which if this is a sudden pain make the patient Emergent because the chance they might be twisted.  Which can lead to many severe problems.  So I mark him Emergent and rush him to the next open room.  We proceed to get more info on him.  Apparently this gentleman of 50 some years old has been suffering from erectile dysfunction.  Because he was so frustrated he decided to try to cut his nuts off.  Right down the seam.  Looks pretty close to the picture above.  You could see his testicles because he cut the sack wide open.  We rushed and got the male doctor.  Who mind you is also a coroner.  (More stories on him later)  He walks in and says dear lord and walks right back out.  Tells the head nurse who is also male to get some wet dressing applied immediately while the surgeon is being called.  The Male nurse is doing this pee pee and kick in the nuts groin dance while being instructed on the dressing needed.  The doctor is still looking a little green while trying to tell the surgeon what this patient has done.  Wild…and is it weird that I wasn’t grossed out?  I was like cool.  While the male population looked at me in their various shades of green.  What?  I didn’t say I didn’t feel bad for him…I did at least shoot him up full of Morphine.

Happy Birthday Hope you like your gift.

Don't try this at home. You may end up in the ER with a scratched cornea. Just ask my husband. Gave him a scratched cornea for his birthday. Figured he didn't have one.  Hmmm I hope he doesn’t play this up for sex all month…or year.  Sheesh.  I swear it was an accident.

When you know your mind is dirty

Watch this and tell me you don’t hear it too.  I know I have a perv mind…but come on Tmobile…really?

Halloween comes before Christmas.

I know it’s not new to you that Halloween comes before Christmas but retail is trying to make people forget.  I noticed this year they marked Halloween up for Clearance before Halloween was here.  That way they could hurry up and get out more of their Christmas Crap.  More as in they already had it out with Halloween stuff.  I wish there was a law that you can't push a Holiday until the last one was completed.  I love my Halloween don’t push me into Christmas.  If Christmas was actually celebrated for the right reasons I might not be so against it.  But it’s so commercialized anymore.  I couldn’t believe Walfart had  Christmas music on already.  It’s suppose to be one time a year not the complete end of the year people!  SHEESH!  So one more day till Halloween!  Let me enjoy it you stupid retail pushers of Christmas!

THE SLOB…RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!

I just don’t understand why my oldest can’t get through her head that her nasty dirty underwear don’t belong in the floor, bed needs to be made and half eaten food doesn’t belong shoved and hidden in her room.  It’s amazing that I left her father when she was 4 yrs. old and yet she does a lot of things he did.  Which drives me insane.  I left my ex for his hoardness and sloppy ways.  So tell me people when it’s your kid what the heck do you do?  You can’t run away from them or leave them.  No matter how much she gets grounded, spanked, goals set to improve, or just yelled at nothing works.  Positive or Negative she still is the nasty child that I love.  She answers the phone and tell important people that we can’t talk right now because we are napping.  Even though we have told her that all important calls need to be given to us.  At least this year her grades have improved. I have to always be on her about feeding her bird or dog.  Not to mention practice your instrument and do your homework.  This has been years of frustration and now she is 14yrs old.  Shouldn’t she know better by now?  I am constantly told by people I am mean because she is always grounded.  What am I suppose to do?  Let her do whatever she wants like her sperm donor’s moms did?  Now he is a burden to the world.  I don’t want her to be supported by the tax payers because she can’t keep a job.  It’s going to be worse for her because it will be hard for her to find a man that wants to marry a slob.  It’s so frustrating.  So please any advice?  Things to try?  Like I said we have tired lists and poster boards to remind her.  We have tried consequences and groundings.  Nothing works!!! GRRRR

Holes in your neck

We had this lady come in a few nights back that came in via ambulance.   They didn’t tell us quite what was going on just that this lady had holes in her neck.  They had the bleeding under control but would explain the situation when they got there.  Apparently they couldn’t figure out if the patient tried to kill their self or if it was an accident.  The patient was drunk as a skunk screaming that she would never hurt herself.  That she would just take pills because it would be easier.   The lady’s hair was matted with dried blood and the front of her shirt look like she murdered someone.  I gloved and gowned up because the patient was trying to get out of bed.  Shouting she didn’t need to be here.  The Doctor was tied up in another room and I was just accessing the damage.  Which didn’t take long since she wouldn’t stay still the washcloth that was covering her neck fell.  While she screamed at us the holes in her neck would open and close.  Which would cause it to bleed and then stop.  Weird and gruesome all at once.  If she caused these holes she was pretty talented.  I was in weird patterns.  After the doctor accessed her apparently she gotten drunk and passed out.  On the way down she must have hit something to cause the weird holes.  Unfortunately even though she didn’t commit suicide she was home alone with 3 small kids.  Not good because this wasn’t the first time.  Meaning social services had to be called.  It took the doctor about an hour to suture her back up.
***morale of the story if your going to drink yourself unconscious lay in the floor and move the furniture prior to partying.