Thursday, August 25, 2011

Drugs not hugs

Yes it’s time for another drug seeker moment…
So my day was running pretty good until a male nurse that I worked with informs me that I need to do a catheter on a female patient.  There is an unwritten rule that female nurses get to to the female caths and male nurses get the male caths.  I really don’t care.  I just do the caths and go about my day.  So I grab the catheter kits and walk into the room of a 30 yr. old that is having problems urinating.  The male nurse is administrating her pain meds.  She tells him is that my diladid?  He reply’s “yes”.  “Hmmm…it can’t be 1mg.  I don’t feel it yet”  “It’s not.  It’s only 0.5mg,” replies male nurse.  “Well that explains why I don’t feel it.”  He leaves and I shoo out her mother and daughter to the hall so I can place the urinary catheter.
She informs me that her equipment is correct like the text book and that she is easy to cath. 
First off TMI…second off how many caths has she had or is she checking out herself in a mirror.  Good grief.  So a little alarm goes off in my head. WARNING:  your about to encounter someone that comes into the ER way to many times.  She then tells me she doesn’t like crying in front of her daughter and begins boo hooing because she is in pain.  Procedure not started by the way.  Boo hooing to the point that the entire ER can hear her.  Including her daughter that is in the hall.  I tell her that hopefully placement of the cath will help with the pressure and relieve her pain.  Cath goes in…crying gets worse.  800ml of urine obtained.  Which isn’t 2 days worth of not peeing.  Which the patient informs is how long its been since she has peed.  I tell her I will let the doctor know that she is in pain.  I told  him.  He wanted to wait till CT is done so we can see what is going on.  Okay I let patient know.  She goes to CT and then comes back with no CT.  Did I tell you this wasn’t my patient??  I hear blood curdling screams and shouts of no no no I hate this place.  I run to the room to see what all the commotion was.  Apparently the Doctor has pissed her off because he won’t give her more drugs to help with the pain so she can be knocked out for her CT.  Because she can not lay like a dollar bill.  I try my best to calm her to no avail.  She is yelling about suing and killing herself and scaring the crap out of her daughter at this point.  I still try to calm her down…no luck.  I talk with the doctor.  She has the choice of CT scan or leaving.  I explain she is having bladder spasms.  So he mentions taking out the cath.  I walk back the screaming lady. “ Ma’am let’s remove the cath and see if that helps the bladder spasms,”  I explain calmly and as nice as possible.  She screams your not touching me !!!!   I try to explain the importance of removing the cath.  She said its helping her pee.  I tell her that the pain escalated after the cath and hopefully this will help with the bladder spasms….to make the story shorter…NO was the final answer..which lead to the Doctor coming into the room with security.  Because at this point the whole ER can hear her screams.  He calmly tells her what her choices are.  She tell him no one is listening to her.  So he gives her the chance to speak by saying…Yes ma’am go ahead I will not talk and I will listen to you.  Which causes her to scream see no one will listen…
Good grief.  The doctor stuck to his guns.  He had a feeling that she had done this before. So we were at a stale mate.  He just told me to leave her be that when she was ready she will come to us to get CT or get cath and IV out.  So I did…until the yelling commenced again and I joined security back into her room.  At which point security informed her that she need to calm down or she would be escorted off the property or mental health would be called.
We left the room…and she took out her own cath and INT…lovely.  I spent forever documenting on this idiot to cover my ass.   She walked out with out signing her AMA forms.  BTW her drug screen came back for: Pot, opioids, tricyclics and benzos…yup and she even told us she was a Nurse and didn’t take any prescribed meds.  Wish this test would have been back before she left.  We did find out she used a fake social security number…and yes she was an LPN in New york…lovely


Ann Worthington said...

Too bad you guys can't tazer people.

Leeanna said...

I'm with Ann. Tazer the fuckers.
Frequent flyers with drug habits had a special place in our ER. We always had their records there waiting and a list of who abuses the system. If they didn't have a legit reason to be there except for meds, then they were escorted out after an exam by the doc of coarse and a drug screen.